The Long Lost Story
of the Kentucky Derby Winners

By Horsetradamus

As curious as it may seem, the following story is one that
demands an open mind and some thoughtful consideration.
This is a story that has been categorized as less than
historically important not because it can not be proven,
moreover that it exists is only proof that it could have been.
Of it’s involvement with history it is clearly evident by the
artifacts which accompany the text, discovered in the now
famous box, have been rigorously inspected and carbon
dated to seemingly place the contents to be authentic.
Quite obviously by proof of these documents existing, the
names of the winners of the Kentucky Derby were written
a long time before the race was ever organized into the
Thoroughbred institution it has become.

Presented here are the words of a story that seems
unbelievable yet here they are right before us. The
accompanying documents only serve to back up the story
with intense accuracy. I know this story sounds impossible
especially when you consider that the relics were
unearthed on the backside at Churchill Downs just
weeks before the one-hundred-thirty-fourth running of
the most legendary Thoroughbred race ever run.
According to the passages found wrapped securely in
the hand crafted ancient box, the winners of the
Kentucky Derby were forecast long before the first
race ever took place.

Though there is no mention of the famous race (at the
time of the writing, there was no Kentucky Derby as we
know it today) a number of documents found with this
important tome place the writing to be possibly pre-civil
war or roughly circa 1850-1855.

Aristides wouldn’t win the first Derby until 1875.

Is it just coincidence or is there more to it?
Naming the winners of the famous race a quarter century
before the first race took place would certainly take quite the
handicapper. The story as it presents itself in chronological
order is just too much to consider that whomever wrote the
story didn’t have some sort of connection to the
future somehow.

Even though there is no mention of the Kentucky Derby
in the discovered text, the story as it lays out with some
important connections to horse racing and the knowledge
of other incidents unknown at the time of the writing of this
story leaves the reader with a lot to think about. Though
the documents divulge no credit, the site diggers
affectionately began to refer to the unknown author as
Horsetradamus because many strange events are spoken of.

The uncanny plot that develops through the use of the
Derby winners has convinced many experts that something
phenomenal has taken place and the connection to the
writings of the famous Nostradamus doesn’t go
unnoticed by the renown experts studying the case.
The “Derby Dig” continues on the backside at Churchill
Downs in an effort to find yet more insights into the
winners of the world’s most legendary race. Most
importantly is the research to divulge the winners
of the Derby beyond what has been yielded from
the documents so far.

The complete text from the “Derby dig” with
notation of Kentucky Derby winners footnoted:

It comes to us that Aristides1 the vagrant2 Athenian
statesman traveled the inaugural voyage between
Baden-Baden3 and Munich in search of a horse race.
The quaint narrow gauge passenger train which had
been christened Daystar4 had been bank rolled by the
industrialist Lord Murphy5 whose wealth had been
diverted from his son’s college fund which had been
parlayed, through wagering on the horses, into great
wealth. Sunny, his son, Fonso6 had attended divinity
school until discovering a mystical Hindoo7 passage on
a field trip, as luck would have it, to northern India. It
was this trip that sparked his life-long interest
in pursuing antiquity. Soon the young Fonso left on
a journey to study the myth of Apollo8. On his travels,
he met the famous professor Leonatus9 Buchanan10
who had served honorably in the military with his uncle
under Major Joe Cotton11. The major was a world traveler
and introduced the inquisitive youth to the wise and learned
Ben Ali12. Swami Ali was an insightful Muslim scholar with
a penchant for the study of Shakespearian letters.

Studying the barb’s style while vacationing in Montrose13
where their meeting took place lead to the publishing of
his work entitled Macbeth II14. The elder scholar had
attended the university in Spokane15 under the tutelage
of the robust professor Augustus Riley16, at the time, as
he always reported, was honored to be the English chair
at Washington University at Kingman17.

Ali and Fonso’s relation grew to more than teacher-student
and one spring they traveled together to the Azra18
Lookout19 near Mount Ranier. The swami and Fonso
would chant20 the ancient Halma21 verse that had been
discovered by Riley’s cohort Doctor Ben Brush22
which he discussed in his publication Typhoon II23
nearly a decade earlier. His critical analysis of the
ancient verse had received tremendous Plaudits24 from
his critics, though his ghost writer known to the public
only as Manuel25 was later discovered to be none other
than Lieut. Gibson.26 His Eminence27 the lieutenant would
co-write many a manuscript using various monikers simply to
hide his identity. Because of a parking violation he wrote a
scathing review against the judicial system creating a
mythical town known as Alan-a-Dale28 where he threw
out criminal justice and reinvented the entire court.

This so infuriated Judge Himes29 that Gibson was
sentenced six months incarceration at the newly instituted
Elwood30 correctional facility near Peoria. He was an
agile31 inmate leaving prison under the order of Judge
Sir Huon32 after negotiating a shortened sentence
through correspondence with his newly acquired
pen pal from outside the institution.

His compatriot, known to us as Pink Star33 was a most
colorful Stone Street34 merchant dealing in the commodity
of Wintergreen.35 Most of Ms. Star’s product was gleaned
from the banks of what she knew as the Donau36 River
in her fatherland of Germany and upon the prisoner
Gibson’s release he and Pink collaborated in the formation
of their spice & trade company known as Meridian.37 With
this enterprise they sold the spice for all it was worth.38

On the passenger train Donerail39 while in transit to
Wales and drinking from a flask of Old Rosebud40, Fonso
wrote that his only regret41 was that his friend Gibson
had to serve time but felt fortunate to partner with Gibson’s
friend George Smith42 who had introduced him to the
writings of one Omar Khyyam.43 It was about the time that
the much heralded and popular calendar exterminator44
was being commissioned by Sir Barton45 to handle the
subversive Paul Jones46 with a simple order of behave
yourself.47 Jones was known to command huge wealth
and was notorious for his secrecy and devotion to the
Persian poet who had written the Rubáiyát.

This unlikely couple of Fonso and Ali searched the world over and though there has been much discussion as to how it happened—they finally discovered Jones’ lair in Morvich,48 Scotland where an eccentric old prospector by the name of Zev49 had discovered what he referred to as black gold.50 Zev and Jones refined the crude bitumen formed in the bogs
into aeroplane fuel which they marketed under
the name of Flying Ebony.51

With such a windfall of peat fuel, soon the entire civilized
world was bubbling over52 with excitement. To celebrate
the boom of oil production, crowds would gather in bars
and drink all night. They celebrated and drank so much
whiskey that soon the pastime became known as a whiskery.53

During one incident of whiskey and burgoo intoxication
in the evening of his reign, Count54 Clyde Van Dusen55
known among his closest friends as the Gallant Fox56
made the financial offering of the unheard amount of
twenty grand57 to franchise an eatery to be known as
Burgoo King.58 Because his favorite Kentucky meal had
always consisted of burgoo and shots of whiskey, he
pursued the thought through many an evening. On an
odd brokers tip60 came a cavalcade61 of offers,
mostly from Omaha62 to invest in this bold venture.63

Soon the celebrated war admiral,64 Sir Lawrin65
Johnstown66 under the guise of upholding the purest
tradition of the Round Table Gallahadion67 pursuits
announced his plan. His goal was to whirlaway68 the
fledgling enterprise and shut out69 the count fleet70
who he claimed was trying to buy them out to render the enterprise null.

This caused a pensive Hoop Jr.71 the jet pilot72 who
had helped to formulate the Flying Ebony brand, to
consider the reformulation of the new fuel forcing the
threat of a citation73 causing all involved to
ponder74 the middleground.75

The reigning magistrate would count turf76 races from
his captain’s chair on the Hill Gail,77 his forty foot sloop
docked on the river. This was the boat with which he beat
the ship Dark Star78 and it was that sea victory as he
referred to it that would determine79 his drive and
passion for winning. “I’d never swaps80 me life with no one”
he was fond of chipping out in a Pop-eyed sailor sort of
delivery as if he were a pirate.

He had long worked with his metaphorical crochet needles81
to create the iron liege82 which rendered him partners with
the Tim Tam83 night club when Mr. Tomy Lee84 ran the
place. Though Mr. Lee was Oriental, he had quite a peculiar
Venetian way85 about him especially when he was forced
into the position to carry back86 decidedly87 the cases
of Chateaugay88 wine that had been delivered in a most
royal fashion by a northern dancer89 from a competing club.

It wasn’t long before the lucky, debonair90 Kauai King91
sent out a proud clarion92 that announced to all that the
dancer’s image93 as portrayed by the act presented a
forward pass94 to his son the majestic prince95 who was
nicknamed by his brilliant desert campaign as the
dust commander96 which had displaced his Christian
name of Canonero II97 which had been given to him after
his great uncle the Duke of Canon.

The great Duke was the sworn enemy of the vicious ruler
Baron Forbes. The Duke's grand nephew, the prince was sired
from a long line of warriors and he, himself had earned his
military commission on Riva Ridge98 when he had ordered,
through the royal secretariat99 a cannonade100 of
foolish pleasure101 to befall the bold Forbes102 who
opposed the gesture most vigorously.

Those who witnessed the event would later sware,
some under oath, that Forbes, from Seattle, slew103
the gesture by simple and brilliant ignorance. The gesture,
which later was affirmed104 in a spectacular bid105 for
dominance that was truly a genuine risk106 to that once
pleasant colony107 of Gato Del Sol108 where life may
never return to normal after being involved in the ensuing
court battle. In the press it was referred to as Alan-a-Dale
on the beach.

Suny’s halo109 floated above his head as he spoke to swami
Ben Ali in his famous deep-throated southern drawl...swale.110

Every time Fonso would spend a buck111 he would exclaim
“swale (swell), here’s to King Ferdinand.112 May his hard
fought victory over Alysheba113 allow the flying of our
winning colors114 in Sunday silence115 as we ride
unbridled116 to strike the gold.117”

It was about that time, Lil E. Tee118 the great grand
daughter of Captain Moses, the venerated sea hero119
who in a pinch would go for gin120 when under pressure
suddenly announced that there would be no more drink.
When pressured once at Thunder Gulch,121 the old sea
captain put his nose to the grindstone122 and produced
a silver charm123 that he presented to the city one
holiday season in though a real quiet124 but nonetheless
charismatic125 presentation. The charm was a sort of dark
purple Fusaichi Pegasus,126 an almost monarchos127 like
war emblem128 that caused all to rethink their response.
It was as if everyone had taken a funny cide129 to calm
their response. They didn’t want to be wise guys and it
was about the time Smarty Jones130 got a threatening
note from Boss Giacomo131 suggesting he stay out of
the Barbaro.132 It didn’t take much street sense133 to know
what that meant. It would be a long time before the situation...

The manuscript mysteriously ends here.

The papers had been water damaged and seemed to
have been almost shredded. Now it seems only the future
will be able to show us the past. The dedicated researchers
have taken it upon themselves to complete the story of
the Kentucky Derby winners.

Alas, only as the name of each year’s winning horse
is announced, will the story continue to write itself. Work continues in trying to piece together the future from
the past. Pictured here, tiny shredded pieces of parchment
with still tinier drops of ink clinging to the pieces are
meticulously placed and microcised for digital enhancement
in an effort to continue the story.The hope is that about twenty percent more may be recovered.

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The story as presented has no connection with reality and any resemblance to authenticated truth is within the reader’s mind only.